Your Friendship Questions, Answered!
As we get older, we lose friends, we gain friends, and we often wonder about friends.
Thanks for being here!
You might be asking why I’m writing about friendship when I usually write about health.
Well, the answer is easy: Friendships and health are so intertwined.
Reams of research and a slew of studies show that good friends benefit your health. Friends give us a sense of belonging and purpose. They lift our spirits when we’re down…and provide a safe haven for secrets, feelings, and advice. Good friends help us cope with trauma, and the really good ones are there to help us celebrate, too.
People with good friends and strong social connections have a reduced risk of many health problems, including high blood pressure, depression, and anxiety. Even weak social interactions - unplanned encounters with strangers, spontaneous conversations, or even brief acknowledgments - can have a positive effect on your health.
In addition to writing thePause, I also co-author (along with friend and colleague, Irene Levine), another newsletter on Substack called Friendship Rules. (That newsletter is presently on hiatus, but there’s lots of beneficial and timeless info to be enjoyed.)
You are never too old to think about friendship. Friendship often takes on a new meaning, a new urgency, and a new definition and understanding as we age. Often, we have been through enough to know how to navigate what can, at times be difficult, while at other times, a pure joy that we swear we cannot live without. And then, there are those times when we are confused and confounded by our friendships, no matter how old we get.
Please take a look below, and read about some situations/dilemmas that have been especially popular with our audience:
When a friendship sizzles out, can it be salvaged?
What? Friendship between different generations? Don’t dismiss it!
Losing a friend can be hard…but friendships can be rekindled.
Why we have fewer friends as we age.
For a Pause…
One of the nicest things a good friend ever did for me was send me an unexpected gift - just because. Not for a birthday or another special occasion, but because she liked something and thought I’d like it, too. So now, I pay it forward. Recently I sent a friend this towel after she admired it in my bathroom. I love the towel (cute, isn’t it?) but love the fact that there is someone else out there enjoying it, too.
I often find that men don’t make friends as easily as women. And I wrote a very personal piece about my husband, You can read it here. (Note: I am grateful it was published…but not a fan of the title change!)
“We loved each other immediately. It was an unexpected love, as deep as it was sudden. Meeting in our thirties, we were brought together by an illness we shared, an illness that only one of us survived.” Another story from me about a friendship that was.
What’s your special friendship story/question/dilemma? Please leave it in the comment section, below!
One More Thing:
Just seeing the cover of this album brings me back to the days of being absolutely smitten and astounded by Carol King’s ability to say it and sing it so beautifully, freely and easily.
Like what you’re reading? If you’re not already a subscriber, go ahead and click the button. It’s free and easy!
And don’t forget to leave a comment if you feel moved, down or troubled by what you’re reading and/or want to speak out!
Until next time. xo